We all know we have to be seen to get on in today’s visual business and social environment. We have to be on social media, in photos and videos, speaking and presenting but…for so many people this is terrifying. Why? Because they don’t feel they look “right”. They don’t feel good about how they look and the image they project. Social media, and the media generally, are guilty as found of perpetrating the “Perfection Myth”
The “Perfection Myth”??? Yes…the impression is that everyone has model good looks, a wonderful relationship with a DH (Darling Husband) or other partner, gorgeous kids who never do anything “wrong” or annoying and just look “munchy” and cute the whole time, a business that is thriving on just 4 hours a week…effortlessly, a designer home kept spotlessly clean and so on.
How many real women do you know who’s life is really like this? None. Exactly. But that doesn’t stop the angst and feelings of inadequacy and failure because the images in the media and social media show them – so they must be true.
This crops up in one version or another time and again when I am working with my clients. And I’ve done it too. My clients are intelligent women, this is not about intelligence.
There is a huge amount of bravado caused by social media in particular and so rather than “bare all” the temptation is to gloss over any challenges and put on an overly brave and bright face. But this doesn’t do it. Underneath those feelings are still there.
The reality is we are not going to change social media and so the only thing we can change is, as always, ourselves – but that too is easier said than done.
Here are some tips that will help you beat the Perfection Myth:
1) Be very clear about how you really want your life to be – to look and feel. What is important to YOU, not to anyone else
2) List all the things in your life that are as you want them to be and put a big smiley face next to them! Then list the things that you would like to change.
3) Take each one of those things you’d like to change individually and allow yourself to dream about/focus on simple steps to make them how you’d like them to be (max 5 steps) and….if you can’t see any way that they could be how you want them to be then:
4) Decide to accept them how they are or find someone to work with who will help you see how they can change (sometimes we can’t see the wood for the trees in our own life even if we can for others)
5) Accept that the images and posts are just one aspect of someone’s life and instead of allowing them to make you feel insecure start to feel inspired, be pleased for them and grateful for the inspiration and “nudge” to do something slightly differently.
6) Embrace your “uniqueness” and focus on the gifts you have. When you do this and you focus on what you bring into the world suddenly the Perfection Myth is beaten…and you become so much more
This is actually a lot of what Red Carpet Body is all about. I help my clients look and feel good in their own skin, I help them make the changes necessary to beat the Perfection Myth and I help them go to a whole new level of self confidence and joy in their life. So if you would like to discuss your situation with me to see if my approach is just what you need right now then email me – Karen@karenkennaby.com and let’s set up a time for a chat to see if we are a good fit.